I've been listening to Liz Phair's 'Exile in Guyville,' which (as previously mentioned) I bought in preparation for my upcoming VH-1 reality series, (10 Years) Behind the Music.
After careful analysis of the lyrics, I'm now convinced that Liz Phair wrote "Flower" about me.
This implies that she is
A). Capable of traveling through time (or at least able to transmit information to her 1993-self.)
B.) Infatuated (perhaps even in love) with me
In the song, she is rhapsodizing about the object (unnamed) of her infatuation. Let's analyze the relevant lyrics:
Hair's too long and in your eyes (most definitely - I easily could do one of those stupid early-90s short ponytails/topknots if I so desired.)
Your lips a perfect suck-me size (debateable)
You act like you're 14 years old. (yup)
Everything you say is so
funny (nearly always)
and mean (occasionally)
I want to be your blowjob queen (undetermined)
You're probably shy and introspective (definitely)
Don't worry Liz, if you're super lucky, I'll be at your show at the 9:30 Club in next week.